I have to admit that I can tend towards the over-sensitive, some have even said that I'd "walk a mile out of [my] way to get [my] feelings hurt." So, curious is my choice to pursue this path of art, with all of my heart. I can't even get a 'no-comment' response, from a gallery, to a personal introduction to my work/website, without spinning into an abyss of self-doubt... This is my excuse for the weeks of blog-haitus.
The meditation of the mandala painting that I've recently discovered is a somewhat interesting deviation of what I've been doing with my art. This guy here, is to me, a clear expression of some of this push and pull I've been feeling this past week or so. The mandalas are a diversion to my direct pursuit of my artistic boundaries, but they provide a very soothing respite from the swirling storm of fear and inspiration. Technically, this mandala is deep red=survival instinc/security, to orange=emotion, to purple=enlightenment, to orange=emotions, and yellow=energy/vitality (or the reverse from inside outward).
I am my own worst critic I know, and I give my own power too easily to others who would give me their approval, or not. Somehow though, I suspect I am not alone as an artist with these kinds of dark thoughts and I am ever the optimist, and I do know that dark times do always make way for brighter days.